In need of a new “I Deserve Better” song? Girl Pow-R has got you covered. Stepping into the ring of toxic relationships and standing up for your own worth, the Juno-nominated group tackles betrayal in their new single Slam. Aside from its strong pop-rock beat and catchy lyrics, the song is noteworthy for the way it promotes setting boundaries and the power of saying no.
Why are Boundaries Important?
Positive Psychology writes, “Healthy boundaries define what is appropriate behavior in our relationships – behavior that keeps both parties safe.” Here, safe can mean a lot of things – emotionally safe, physically safe, mentally safe.
They continue, “By setting boundaries in relationships, we also discover which relationships are healthy and which are not.” In other words, boundaries are a way of identifying and enforcing your internal compass. Put simply, this keeps you healthy and happy. Think of setting boundaries like a coffee pot – you can’t fill someone else’s mug without a full pot to begin with.
In their power single Slam, Girl Pow-R demonstrates how setting boundaries and saying no are necessary. The song describes a betrayal and the singers’ refusal to be treated unfairly: “You snuck around my back / And I will not take that.” They identify a boundary, make it clear that it was crossed, and condemn the disrespect towards their relationship: “You used to stand by me / And now I need to be free.”
Saying No is Hard
In a world that aligns worth with always saying yes – yes to that job, yes to that favour, yes to that event, yes-yes-yes-all-the-time – it becomes difficult to do the opposite. This is particularly true for women, non-binary, and trans folks brought up within conventional, heteropatriarchal expectations.
Under those auspices, anyone who is not a cisgendered, heterosexual man is quiet, passive, and obedient; they don’t argue, and they don’t question. Speaking on experiences of women, Anna Baréz Brown of The Guardian explains, ““No” is not a word that women are brought up to use at work, or at home. We are brought up to believe that being nice and cooperative is what gets you praise.” Tuning out all that noise is no small task, but oh the joy when you do.
Empowering Young People to Say No
Saying no, especially against expectations of docility, is often construed as a negative action. In fact, the opposite is true. Setting boundaries and saying no demonstrates a level of self-care and self-respect – you understand your needs and are taking action to enforce them for your own health and happiness.
A far cry from negativity, the lyrics of Girl Pow-R’s Slam celebrate having the confidence to stand your ground and fight for your needs: “Gonna stand tall / Won’t make me fall.” Not only have they located what is best for their own health and happiness, they also find empowerment in having the courage to go after it: “I am on to better things / Found myself in new rings / Moving on, happy now.”
Psychology Today puts it well: “The strength we draw from saying No is that it underscores this hard truth of maturity: The buck stops here.” Remember what Anna Baréz Brown said above – being perpetually cooperative does not guarantee that others will treat us the same way. Relationships are privileges, not rights. You are worthy of being treated with respect, and that includes how you treat yourself. Setting boundaries and saying no are strong ways of doing just that.
We learn from those we look up to. Girl Pow-R understands this and are putting in the work. Exemplifying the power of no and setting boundaries, Girl Pow-R are empowering young people the world over – one song at a time.
Sometimes, we all need to be Revenge Taylor. Add Slam by Girl Pow-R to your “I Deserve Better” playlist on Spotify and Apple Music. Don’t forget to subscribe to their YouTube channel for the latest music video and BTS content!
Ready for more inspiring and uplifting music? Follow Girl Pow-R on social media!
GIRL POW-R
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